The Second Half
“Daisy taught me that after the world ended, you still have to get up in the morning, and the things that [were] ruined would still be there, needing to be fixed. When I looked at famous Jay Gatsby, soul gone and some terrible engine he called love driving him now, I could see that for him, the world was always ending. For him, it was all a wreck and a ruin, and he had no idea why the rest of us weren’t screaming.” - The Chosen and the Beautiful - Nghi Vo
I picked up The Chosen and the Beautiful from my local library because I liked the title and that it written by a Vietnamese author. Then, I started recognizing character names like Daisy, Tom, Nick, and Jay Gatsby as characters from F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby. After a quick search, I learned Vo’s book is a retelling of The Great Gatsby from the point of view of a Vietnamese adoptee version of Jordan Baker (the golfer friend of Daisy and Nick Carraway’s summer girlfriend). I barely remember the original book, so I had to look up the characters and their significance. Anyway, Vo writes such beautiful prose, and the above quotation punched deeply the first time I read it.
Toward the end of June I was prepping to write a post about the second half of the year - the goals I had, and how I was going to laser-focused in certain areas of my life. I was plotting my glorious return to my blog, but then my mother passed away unexpectedly. Everything changed. And nothing changed. I’m still here, but now I wonder why no one else is screaming. The first half of the year flew by, and now time feels painfully slow. Everything is moving around me, but I’m barely moving.
But I am moving.
Slowly adjusting to this new world where everything is the same, but also different in a way that’s specific to me. I know it will get better, and I am truly okay. Okay is good enough for now.
The second half of my year may not be going according to my plans, but I’m pressing on. I’m going to focus on my health and writing over the next few months. I plan to post at least twice a month. So, as long I get another post in by Sunday, I’ll be good on that front. I still have a lot to be grateful and hopeful about, and I’m looking forward to the challenges of a new academic year. I still believe there’s lot of good ahead of me.
Kimberly
“May the best of your todays be the worst of your tomorrows.” - “Have it All” by Jason Mraz
